Self-Love Over Validation: 5 Empowering Ways to Embrace Your True Self

It denotes self-love

Are you constantly seeking approval from others? It’s time to turn inward. Discover why self-love is the key to starting a unique transformative journey.

We all yearn for love, attention, and validation. Yet, prioritizing these desires over our mental health can be detrimental. True love begins with self-acceptance. Embrace your flaws and love yourself unconditionally to draw in those who will appreciate the real you.

Different thought leaders and Coaches have different perspectives on this concept, but here are five ways that come to mind when I think of true self-love. 

Recognize Your Divine Creation

You are a masterpiece, intricately designed by the Creator. Embracing this truth is the first step toward self-love. The divine affection bestowed upon you is a testament to your worth. Your Creator loves you enough and has given you the grace to think, do, and live your present life. So bask in that grace. Know that your Lord loves you enough, just how you are, and that is all that matters. 

However, this requires you to dive into the knowledge of your Creator, build a connection, and align your life with His pleasure.

Present Your Authentic Self

Shed the layers of pretense and societal expectations. Forgive past transgressions and accept your imperfections. Being authentic sets the stage for personal growth and inspires others to do the same.

The more you bask in the grace that you were created in the best of forms, the easier it becomes to show up as your authentic self. 

Be your best self—stop pretending to be who you are not. No people-pleasing; it’s a form of seeking external validation. No conforming to societal expectations or trying to fit in when you should be standing out. No more suppressing your feelings; instead, set boundaries.

However, this requires a deep self-awareness and self-acceptance –  understanding your strengths, weaknesses, and potential. Take it upon yourself to invest in personal growth, as it will open you up to possibilities and more opportunities to start living your best life.

Remember, you are a mere human who can never be perfect, so start taking baby steps until you reach your desired goal.

Pursue Beneficial Endeavors

As you get comfortable showing up as yourself and consistently working on your personal growth, the need to explore your God-given gifts, especially those you can use to benefit yourself and others, cannot be overemphasized.

Whether at work, as a SAHM, or as a student, you can serve others by using your gifts to solve problems or change lives. Start with your immediate environment and gradually grow to attract those you have been called to serve.

Embrace your innate talents and use them to benefit both yourself and others. Serve your community with confidence, and you’ll find your worth as a beacon of hope.

Develop Impactful Resources 

Self-love and Personal Growth require an open mind. As you get busy doing things that benefit you and others, you can leverage this to craft resources to help others move from point A to point B.

When you stay consistent, you attract the right people who need to solve a problem you are highly knowledgeable about or have overpowered.

Remember not to build your self-worth based on your creations as you create.

Craft a Life of Meaning 

You’ll realize your true value by recognizing your divine creation and authenticity. This will make it easier for you to invest in continuous improvement and prevent you from relapsing into seeking validation or approval from others to live your best life.

Now is the perfect time to create a life that aligns with what pleases God, harness your gifts, share your voice, and leave a lasting legacy, all without compromising your self-love and personal growth


In Bridget Devoue’s wise words, “Your biggest commitment must always be to yourself.” Invest in your well-being, cherish your blessings, and pursue your aspirations. The only validation you need is your own. Reflect on your journey, identify gaps, and prioritize self-love. It’s time to come home to yourself.

Which of these have been missing, and where have you been seeking to be loved that is costing you your overall well-being?